Life yesterday, today and tomorrow

There's a time that we suddenly remembered someone that we had forgotten for a long time. It was back when you never know their existence. Suddenly, out of the blue, someone mention their name. You suddenly know what would happen to you. All the memories, long talks, sweet conversations and everything about them is rushing in your little mind. You know that you miss them for a sudden. You know that you need them at that time. You know that everything would be back to normal when you are with them.
Then, suddenly it goes to where you started to become friends with the person. In a short time, your relationship gets stronger, and then there's the time that both of you are committed to be together. Everything seems blissful. Its like in a dream, but you are in reality. Realising this, you know you are the happiest person in the world. Lots of things that you have done with this person. Its just so happy and undescribable, like you know you'll be always living in a great day everyday. It was a bless. You are thankful to God in what you have been given. Having this person has been enough in your life, because both of you completes each other.
However, the CONFLICT come. You both blame each other. You both knew that apologizing each other and that fixing up the broken pieces is the best. This is because both of you wants to keep each other at their side. This is love. But, love that only comes from one side would not be enough. There's EGO to stir up the relationship. There DISTRUST to destroy everything. You are no longer trust each other. It became hates mingled with love. You either want to let go, but you still want to keep holding on. Still, it hurts the both of you. You are no longer the same anymore. Same with your partner. There's ARGUES that keeps on growing up and worsen. Both of you know the decision is just to let go. Even if it hurts, but it is the best. You know that it will be okay because that hurts is only once and it can be healed. So, both of you break the chains that once binded you together. Each leaving the traces of memory that could never be forgotten but could only be missed and remembered. In each others heart, both are hoping that you could never be taken. And you will be waiting them, but you never know what would happen in the future.
Now that it has been a long time. You have healed from the broken heartedness. You are no longer crying each and every night. You are no longer feel like you are going to die, but then it was from this someone that you knew mentioned them. It is clearly that everything that was buried behind has been dug out. You just don't know  what to do. It suddenly hurts you. You feel helpless. Tears rolled down back but, it just a tears of regret. Sometimes it is the tears of wonder. You either feel thankful for what you are now. Thankful that all the broken hearted makes you a stronger being. If you feel sad, maybe its just that your feelings towards this person is so strong. You just can't let them go. Even seeing them moving on happily feels so hellish to you. Right behind them and deep down in your heart, you just want them to come back to you. Everybody would feel like that. Some are strong to accept the changes, because they have to take a new chances for their life. Some are just afraid to move on. Stuck it their way. Waiting for that someone. Whatever it is, if you are being like that, you won't see your beautiful life in front of you. Who knows there might be your prince charming waiting for you ahead, willing to take your hand like a princess and heals all your wounds and bruises that comes from your long journey just to find them.
In short, life is always beautiful. Even if you misses this one person who once lighten your world, it doesn't mean that your world would always be dark. There are a lot of lights in this world. Find some light that could never be fix, repaired or replaced. Your world is important to you. Colored it with experience, joy, happiness and laughter. Even you know you might fall and fall again, you can always get up, clears the dust on your knee, give your biggest smile to the world, and say "I'm Okay!". When life gets tired of your hyperactivity, that's when they give up and just let you be you. :)

Someone is watching over Me

Do you ever feel that you are being watched by someone else? Not the kind that of watch where somebody is stalking you. Its a kind like where you know that someone that you know is taking over this somebody's job to watch over you, taking care of you, and reporting everything about you. It's not that you are obsessed with it. It is just your instinct telling you to it.
You can refuse to reject this kind of feelings, but what if its get stronger and you just don't know what to do. There are times that you just want to ask the person directly. It is so annoying when you feel like that. The feeling of annoyed mixed tears that you want to blurt out mixed with the feeling of missing them so badly. It is hurting you inside, but you just don't know what to say what to do. All you hope is that someone would come and tell the whole truth to you. You just want them to say "I miss you so much" or "I love you" or "I am sorry for what I have done."
Even if this word is uttered in their mouth, you know you want it from them, but you were so angry to them that they took a long time to say it to you. At the time you want to forgive them, you remember all the things why both of you being like this. In the end, the ego comes up and destroyed everything, where you just stay silent, move away from them with tears in the eyes and hoping that they might come and rescue you. Its a kind of rescue where someone hugs you from your behind and whispered in your ear that they needed you so badly and doesn't want to lose you anymore.
It would be the best feelings if everything of this would come true. But, you just have to make your own choices then. Choose wisely so that it might not hurt you again. Choose so that you can grow in faith and hope.

Another Comeback

I am so sorry for not writing again. It has been so long that I didn't write it here. Haha! Well, I am back now. It just that I don't have any ideas what to wrote here. There's no exciting moment about me this time. I am so busy with my assignments and group projects. Well, by the way, I thought of going to take neuroscience as my final year project. However, I didn't get it. Too bad. Still, I'm planning to get neuroscience, because its what that I am interested in. Actually, the real thing that I am interested in is more into technical, but I'm scared that I might not be able to cope it. I'm scared that I might be too tension and depressed. Point on the my health condition again, that does not required me to work very hard, especially on physical thing. Well, I'm glad that I can write here again. I tried to find time again to wrote a lot of interesting stuff. :)

Flowers

I have found me a new hobby. Taking pictures of a flower. I seems to be attracted to flowers suddenly. Their smells, colors and pattern which makes you happy just to see them. Of course this picture above is not something that what would I capture. It just an example to me to take a beautiful flowers. Well, it seems that this is the beautiful pictures that catch my eyes. I hope that each time I encountered a flower, I would take its picture. Hope I could gain something from my new hobby which is photography. :)

   

Mend a Broken Heart

     There are times that we are so shattered, lonely, sad and feels like our heart has broken to pieces. Everybody experienced it. Many can endure it, and some ended their lives just because they thought that there are no ways to heal them. however, I just want to share some of the quotes that I found that may heal a broken heart. It might be temporary, but at least it will gives you time to think about your future.

"Giving up doesn't always mean you are weak; sometimes it means that you are strong enough to let go."

–Author Unknown

"Sadness flies away on the wings of time."

-Jean de La Fontaine

"I thought when love for you died, I should die.
It's dead. Alone, most strangely, I live on."

-Rupert Brooke

"Sadness flies on the wings of the morning and out of the heart of darkness comes the light. "

-Jean Giraudoux

"When love is lost, do not bow your head in sadness; instead keep your head up high and gaze into heaven for that is where your broken heart has been sent to heal."

-Author Unknown

"A final comfort that is small, but not cold: The heart is the only broken instrument that works. "

-T.E. Kalem

"Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together."

-Author Unknown

"Don't worry about losing. If it is right, it happens - The Main thing is not to hurry. Nothing good gets away."

-John Steinbeck

"Count the garden by the flowers, never by the leaves that fall. Count your life with smiles and not the tears that roll."

-Author Unknown

"Yes, I will go. I would rather grieve over your absence than over you. "

-Antonio Porchia

"Let no one who loves be unhappy... even love unreturned has its rainbow. "

-James Matthew Barrie

“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.”

- Mark Twain

"It is better to have loved and lost than never to have lost at all."

-Samuel Butler

"Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go."

- Herman Hesse

"Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of withering, of tarnishing."

- Anais Nin

Trip to Damai Beach Resort

How the resort actually looks like at this view.

My friend took this and I have no idea why.

At the back of the resort is a magnificent view of greenery.

Outstanding sight combined with the blue sky.

This looks a little bit romantic, right?

The sand looks so orange!

Nice pattern of the pavement

The statue of the hornbill.

Look at the sky! The best scenery that I've ever catch!

Same goes here. Nice scene.

Cute little Mr Crab

I don't know what am I suppose to call this creature. Sea worm maybe?

The fishies who never stops swimming. They are just shy.

Sunset

I like the color of the sun.

Setting sun

Scene at night time at the resort

This is the trip organised by our KO-Q team, Fotografi Kreatif. It was a fabulous visit to the resort, although it is only for one day. We had a lot of fun walking here and there, snapping pictures, posing everywhere like a model. Sadly, some of the picture that my friend took with her DSLR are corrupted. I tried to help her, recovering all the corrupt files, but it;s just hopeless. So, in the end, the nice picture could not be uploaded here. However, it remains a sweet memory to us. I hope there are more trips like this that I could visit, and took many picture. I'm kind of obsess with taking pictures nowadays, especially towards the beautiful, unique and aesthetic thing. :)

Flash Mob Unimas

Posing like a model after watching the unfinished concert.

Freestyles pose which attract the audience! :D

Another model-like pose. Guess where am I?

Too close to the camera? Cute. :)

A tired face, but happy. Still energetic to do happy faces.

A model like us

Cool, unique, funny ( that's us! )

still better.

Solo shoot to my cute friend here.

This is me. Simple.

My tall friend who acts cool. LEGENDARY!

This is the best 12/12/12 memories that I have made with my friends. We are following the Flash Mob under our universities. It involves with almost 300++ students. I just couldn't believe it that I am following something big like this. I am really a new me! Anyway, these flash mob would be in the Guinness Book of Malaysia's Records, as the biggest flash mob among universities.( I think? ) I build a lot of memories which is both happy, tired, excited and enjoy. It only took me two days to practice the dance. It was not so hard, and I can compromise with it. I love the uniqueness of the dance, which combines the ethnicity in Sarawak and freestyles which suited the music. The most famous dance is The Gangnam Style Dance. I thought it was ridiculous if I am doing this, but I did enjoy all the thing, and it was really fun. I couldn't believe that I could be so energetic although at that time, I was really busy with my assignments and projects. I remembered, I have not enough sleep for almost four days. The most exciting things here is that we got that beautiful black shirt for free! It was what all the students were so exciting about. Who would never wants a free gifts. Right? Another thing is, we got a free ticket to the concert held in the hall. It was so fun and lively as artists came and sing an old and legendary songs, which brings back the memory. It was so good at that time, as youngsters like us should appreciate music, in all genres. The most fun moment is when the orchestral group play a jazz music. It was so calming and if I have to tell my feelings at that time, I think I could not describe it. However, I do have fall asleep at that time, because I realized  I was so tired due to lack of sleep. Nonetheless, it was exciting at that time, because that was the newborn of new me. I am willing to take my new changes. I am not shy in front of everyone. I really didn't do dancing in front of everyone, but this time, I made it. Next time, I would look forward to a more exciting and adventurous activities.